Following Marriage Counseling to Overcome Domestic Conflicts

Not always a household that you build with a partner running smoothly. Surely there are small pebbles that appear in your marriage. Actually the presence of problems in the household is natural, but what is not natural is when it becomes prolonged, getting worse, or triggering divorce. Lack of communication, not respecting each other, blaming each other, not wanting to budge, or often clashing arguments with a high pitch are some of the characteristics of an unhealthy household. But you can still save your household harmony by attending marriage counseling. Domestic conflicts can start from the side of men and women. Both have a big share in the occurrence of conflict, so to fix it, it also requires effort and cooperation between husband and wife. Domestic conflicts can be experienced by anyone, both young newlyweds, and couples who are no longer young. Counseling is also often needed by couples who have certain mental disorders. A marriage counselor is a professional third party that you can ask for help to improve household relations. Two people who are filled with anger will not be able to solve the problem with a cool head. What often happens is that you and your partner will feel the most right so that the meeting point is never found. A counselor as a third party can help to see and overcome your household problems objectively. Several studies have shown that marriage counseling can save households that are on the edge, if handled by a competent counselor. A marriage counselor is someone who has gone through special education or training so that he has experience, insight, skills and character to see and find solutions to the problems he encounters. A good counselor must be patient, non-judgmental, and accept the patient's condition as it is.

What You Can Get from Marriage Counseling

Basically, marriage counseling is done to provide solutions to problems that are present in your household. The counselor will help solve the problem by giving advice or tips on how to wisely solve the problem you are facing.

• Initial counseling

The first session of counseling, you and your partner will be asked a number of questions by the counselor, such as how long the age of marriage, how often have sex, and what household problems that do not go away.

• Understanding the background of marriage

Marriage counselors will express their opinions about problems that occur in your household. In addition, he will also provide a treatment plan for you and your partner.

• Feel the results

Generally after five visits, the couple can feel the benefits of marriage counseling, such as communication that is starting to improve or conflicts that have begun to abate.

Try to be open in counseling, reveal all that needs to be revealed, so that the counselor is able to help you and your partner find a point of problem that triggers domestic conflict. Remember that your counselor is a consultant, who is responsible for serving partner counseling, but the success of counseling is very much influenced by the will and proactive efforts of you and your partner. Marriage counseling includes brief therapy. Usually it takes 12 meetings to help restore harmony to your household. However, the results for each partner may differ according to the intensity of the next visit and how strong you and your partner are trying to maintain the relationship.

How to Choose the Right Marriage Counselor?

Here are some ways you can do to determine the right marriage counselor.

• Ask friends or family

An easy way to choose a marriage counselor is to ask for recommendations from friends or family who have already undergone counseling and benefit from it. However, if none of them has ever undergone marriage counseling, you can ask for a recommendation from a doctor.

• Gather information

Call or visit some of the leading clinics and ask for recommendations on the name of a counselor you can go to. After getting a few names, you can try to make an appointment with one or more of these names.

• Make observations

On your first marriage counseling visit, try to notice how the counselor does his work and ask yourself the following questions. Are the questions posed to you enough to make your feelings relieved? Are the questions raised related to your problem? Does speaking the language can make you calm? Is he patient? If the answer is yes, then you can continue the next counseling session with the counselor. In essence, look for a counselor who feels comfortable to work with you and your partner.

Unhealthy marriages must be dealt with immediately. Not only does it affect happiness, troubled households also have an impact on personal health. According to research, people who undergo unhealthy household relations will be more at risk for heart disease. So if you still love your partner, family, and your health, it's better to overcome all household problems with the help of marriage counseling. The faster you act, the marriage will be easier to save.